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Assertiveness Training
Today's focus is on
motivation.
Motivation is one of the great
secrets of our mind.
Motivation is emotional fuel.
It is the starting point to any
step in life. Having clear
energy sources and motivation
channels is one of the main keys
to success.
Here are three direct ways to
pump up you...
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Assertiveness Training
Tell me if this sounds familiar -- someone asks you to do something that you really don't want to do or you honestly don't have time for. It might be a church bake sale, a school fundraiser, participating on a committee, or even just working late. But you feel like you will let the other person down if you say no. You feel GUILTY already, and you haven't even responded yet! So you say, "Sure," even though doing so is going to put you under tremendous stress and PRESSURE. You know that you will p...
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Assertiveness Training
1.) Ask yourself, "What's the worst that could happen?" Too often, we place excess importance on potential problems. We all have a certain amount of energy so let's apply it to creating extraordinary relationships, advancing our careers and meeting our goals INSTEAD of wasting that energy worrying. Take action on what you have control over and minimize risks for what you don't. Then invest your energy wisely.
2.) In doing something for the first time, imagine that you have already done it in...
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Assertiveness Training
An Assertive Person is not an Adversary
Speaking up for oneself in an assertive manner sometimes brings to mind the image of two people warily circling each other, fists raised, prepared to strike. Each person wants to get his/her way.
In fact, the most effective assertiveness is not adversarial at all. The most effective way of speaking up involves connecting with or joining in with the other person.
Without engaging in connecting, a person may use perfect assertive language and sti...
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Assertiveness Training
There was once a time (and there still is, to a certain degree) when I would say 'Yes' to every opportunity, request, suggestion, good idea, and even mediocre idea that came my way. And let me tell you, it was exhausting.
It was like I had this automatic, knee-jerk reaction to accommodate any suggestion that came my way - as if it were my karmic duty. I call this auto-response being a 'yes-dog'. Perhaps you know the feeling.
When you're a yes-dog, your entire being is all about making othe...
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Assertiveness Training
In your journey through life are you the "driver" or the "passenger"?
Let me be perfectly clear what I mean about this statement. In other words,do you take charge of your own life? Do you make the judgment and set the goals for what you want your life to be like? - Or - Do you let others
influence you and follow in their footsteps?
This is a very important question you should be answering. After all it is "your life" you should be the one designing it and being happ...
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Assertiveness Training
ASSERTIVE RESOLUTIONS FOR THE NEW YEAR
January 1, 2000 has arrived. One way to prepare for the
Year 2000 is to make a few New Year's resolutions.
A resolution is an assertion that you make to yourself
and sometimes to others as well.
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CHARACTERISTICS of an ASSERTIVE RESOLUTION:
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An assertive resolution
**Is a stand that you take **first with yourself**
**enhances your self-esteem.** The other...
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Assertiveness Training
You never know, when someone is going to flip out, and start firing a gun into a restaurant or store filled with innocent people.
It could happen. It has happened. And now we have the threat of terrorism added.
So, how do you stay safe?
Here's a simple tip, adapted from the world of martial arts.
Many martial artists never sit with their back to a door, or a street-oriented window.
These martial artists always sit with their backs to a wall, 'facing' the door. It's their safe...
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Assertiveness Training
Many people confuse being self-effacing with politeness. When complimented, instead of saying a simple thank you, they disparage the compliment. Someone says, "That's a nice dress you're wearing." And the reply often is, "Oh, this old thing? I don't know why I put it on." This is possibly because they have been taught that accepting compliments is somehow akin to having a sinful pride. I'm not saying anything is wrong with their teaching. I'm just wondering if maybe they've grown past their upbr...
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Assertiveness Training
Many years ago, I ran a part-time resume service out of my New York apartment. My client showed up on time for her first appointment, nervously clutching her old resume.
"Can we just talk for awhile?" she asked.
"No," I said firmly, amazing myself. "If you want me to work on your resume, there will be a charge. You can decide not to hire me. But we can't just sit and talk."
I remembered this incident yesterday, when I greeted a neighbor in our local coffee shop.
"I've got a frien...
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Assertiveness Training
In my travels across North America speaking on motivation and human potential I hear the same question asked repeatedly, " How can I become more assertive?" There is no doubt about it, there are people in our lives who are harmful to our health and we don't like it one bit.
I read recently that toxic people make up about ten percent of the population and cause over 50% of all relational damage. For our own well-being and the well-being of those we care about we must learn how to cope with th...
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Assertiveness Training
I am the victim of a hovering parent. At times, it seems that almost nothing I do is right according to my mother. My decision-making is questioned in regards to my parenting skills, my relationships and even how I keep my home. She means well but she can be a bit overbearing at times. I used to get rather frustrated and resentful of her constant nitpicking but through continual personal development, I have learned how to deal with her. Our relationship has drastically improved since I have chan...
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